all but forgotten: tevin campbell 1990-1996

damn not much luv out there for tevin campbell. geez. dude had 2 very successful albums in the early 90s…and then you all abandoned him. his debut album, t.e.v.i.n. was released near his 15th birthday in november 1991 and spawned 5 hit singles, spread out over the next two years: “tell me what you want me to do” in 91, “goodbye” & “alone with you” in ’92 and even into 1993: “confused” & “look what we’d have.” that’s pretty damn exceptional.

tevin campbell returned in fall ’93 with an even more successful sophomore cd, “i’m ready.” it generated 4 huge hits: “can we talk”, “i’m ready” & “always in my heart” in collaboration with laface. prince’s sensual “shhh” released as an album cut in late ’93 ensured that “i’m ready” would be tevin campbell’s most successful cd & tevin campbell spent all of ’94 near the top of the charts.

but then…his third album in 1996, “back to the world”…the cd cover image…the braids. dayum. career ender there. the scandal of his arrest in a men’s restroom in ’99 didn’t even generate enough interest in his final self-titled album that same year. no matter; before usher, we had tevin campbell’s teenage swagger and it wasn’t bad.

anal warts, anal cancer & anal pap smears

my doctor suggested an anal pap smear. it’s a test for abnormal cells generated by the hpv virus (anal warts) that may indicate anal cancer.  i agreed. the results were inconclusive so there’ll be a follow-up with a specialist. great. i bottom one time in my life and all this shit happens….lol.

anyway…it appears that anal cancer is a serious & growing health issue and has begun to affect the gay community at startling rates. i googled anal cancer for more info and i came across an alarming article from the southern voice, an lgbt publication, that bluntly states the facts about the connection between gay men, anal sex, anal warts, and anal cancer. the entire article is worth reproducing here:

Anal Warts, Anal Cancer, and Anal Pap Smears

Anal Cancer, which is rare in the general population, is somewhat common among men who have sex with men. It is also increased in women who have anal sex with multiple partners. It is something you should know about. It is very difficult to treat, and like most cancers, survival is much better if it is detected early. Some new important studies about it have been published recently. It is being talked about more, and recommendations for screening will probably appear over the next few years.

Anal cancer bears some resemblance to cervical cancer in women. Like cervical cancer, anal cancer is often caused by infection with the human papillomavirus (HPV), the virus that causes genital warts. It is spread by sexual contact. While unprotected anal intercourse is the most common way to get the infection (and warts) in and around the anus, anal penetration is not necessary. Rubbing the penis outside the anus can pass the virus. It may also be spread by hands or by sex toys. The infection causes small warts around and inside the anus or in the genital area. However, noticeable warts do not have to be present for a significant infection or cancer to exist.

Most people with anal warts do not develop anal cancer. People with HIV, especially with low CD4 counts, are much more likely to develop cancer from anal warts. A normal immune system is often able to kill the cancer cells. However, anal cancer does occur in HIV negative men. Certain strains of the HPV virus are more likely to cause cancer. Ironically, some of the most cancer producing strains make flat warts that are difficult to see.

There are several methods to test for HPV infection, pre-cancerous cells, and cancer in the anal area. The most accurate is biopsy, done by snipping a small piece of tissue from the anal canal. Because it is costly and a little painful, it is usually reserved for patients with a suspected problem or a positive Pap smear. A Pap smear usually refers to a sample taken from a woman’s cervix, but it may be done from other areas of the body. For an anal Pap smear, a cotton swab is placed in the anus and rotated to pick up cells. It is painless. The sample is then looked at under a microscope to identify abnormal cells. There are also other tests that use a swab and high tech methods to identify the virus.

Routine screening for anal cancer with anal Pap smears in high-risk groups is not done yet, but it may be soon. In the last 4 years, there have been numerous articles in the medical literature about screening for anal cancer and HPV infections. They mostly recommend it for homosexual and bisexual men who are HIV positive, the group at highest risk. In May, there was an article in the prestigious Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA) showing the usefulness of routine anal Pap smear screening of HIV positive gay men. It demonstrated a decrease in death and illness at a cost similar to screening tests now in use for other illnesses. However, there are still questions that need to be answered and logistical problems to be solved, before screening programs are widely accepted.

What can you do before testing is available? Pay close attention to your body. If you have anal or genital warts, keep a close eye on them. Find a doctor you feel comfortable with, and have them checked, both for treatment to remove them and to look for suspicious areas. If you have any rectal problems, see your doctor. Most importantly, make sure you are always having safer sex. It’s not just for HIV prevention. There are many illnesses that are passed sexually, and others will be discovered. Protect yourself.

main pageselected articles

wow…i can’t help but think that maybe this is just one more natural conviction of a deviant lifestyle…fellas: *ahem* get your anal pap smears.

jock itch scars

i had no idea how hideous my jock itch scars were. i finally took a good look at my body and it is a dark, nappy mess down there. when did this happen?? omg. wtf. then my belly of course…it used to be so different. 20 years ago…give me back the body i had then. i’ll take better care of it, i promise.

now i feel absolutely unattractive. at least to the people who i’m attracted to…the pretty people. i’ve never been one but i’ve done ok lol. but i look at my body now and can’t possibly see how anyone could be turned on by it. i can only hope it looks different through a lens of lust lol.

i remember when i first felt jock itch. took me a while to get treated cause scratching down there felt so good. lol i’ve probably had it on and off for the last 13 years or so. i should have taken care of it the first time. never was consistent applying the fungal cream. it’s greasy and odorous. if you don’t apply it to the area twice daily for nearly 2 weeks it keeps returning.

i first noticed the scarring about 5 or 6 years ago. i was alarmed then but after that i only made sure i was consistent applying the cream whenever my crotch started to itch. man i used to get carried away scratching lol. but the itch was so intense…and i would often scratch until i drew blood. then it burned like hell showering.

i continued to ignore my jock itch scars. heck black people don’t scar well. the skin gets even darker, and coarse. that’s what’s going on in my crotch. now i’m propelled to action after looking at myself on video. what can i use to get rid of scars? cocoa butter of course…what am i thinking. 100% cocoa butter sticks…man they work wonders. we’ve used them in our family for generations.

i just have to apply the stick of cocoa butter to my crotch each time i shower. it’s also greasy but has a pleasant smell, like chocolate. i figure it will take at least a month of applying it twice every day before i see results. but i’m gonna start tonight.

the thought that counts: valentines day

what is this nuisance they call valentines day. lovers needed a holiday all to themselves i suppose. and now look what it’s become: another last minute rush for a gift. ridiculous. that’s not the way you show your boo you love them. however…gentlemen if you got a tax refund & don’t pickup anything you might be ignored for the next couple days lol.

but, gentlemen…i suppose we’ve been warned. even if things haven’t been good at home at least come in with flowers today. then they won’t be able to use ‘and you couldn’t buy me nothing for valentines day’ as leverage in an argument lol. no excuse…all these street vendors out here with useless heart balloons and teddy bears attached by straws…hell, get her the big one for $20. she’s worth more than the change you’ll get from your $20 bill lol.  so what if it’s going to sit on the baby’s dresser on top of the one you got her last year…shit she deserves it for putting up with you lol.

it’s the thought that counts anyway. really. so show that you thought & cared like you were supposed to so you would spend money and give retailers a happy valentines day! lol

snow day in nyc: 2.10.10

it wasn’t exactly a blizzard, but new york city got walloped by a massive snow storm today. predictions yesterday were for 12-18 but we were mostly ended up in the 6-12 range. i hear we here in the bronx got the most snow, 10 inches. that’s pretty good.

new york city mayor mike bloomberg jolted parents but elated students when he announced yesterday that schools would be closed today in advance of the storm. this gave parents plenty of time to make alternative plans but the snow day was totally unexpected. our meteorologists caught it for their prediction of 12 inches of snow last weekend when we didn’t see a single flake. many were wary also because during the evening the temperature felt seasonable, warm, even. how could a blizzard be on the way, we thought…

but indeed, the predicted storm arrived with snowflakes around 4 am and by 7 am had covered the sidewalks. snow fell for the rest of the morning and afternoon. thankfully, there weren’t blizzard conditions but it was a challenge getting around.

the girls wanted to play in the snow but i am really too old for that. really. i love the way snow looks but hate that it’s so cold. it gets in places and makes you cold. i hate to be cold…and wet. ewww. sorry, no snow play for me anymore lol.

but their mom took them to the park to romp in the snow a little after we exchanged parenting duties lol. they got to enjoy it. see i remember the feb. 12 snowstorm in 2006, the presidents’ day blizzard in 2003 & the blizzard of ’96. each of those storms dumped nearly 2 feet of snow on nyc. the snow wouldn’t melt for days, it just got dirtier and dirtier…and the slush. it’s horrible getting around nyc after a snowstorm but we’re new yorkers and we do it.

anyway, the pic is from snowfall we had in december 2008. i’m too uninspired to catch another image of snow in new york lol. this one’s damn good so i’ll keep using it. happy snow day! 2.10.10. can’t wait to see what the weather will be like 5.10.10. bet you it’s a beautiful day with blue skies and a warm breeze. hurry up spring!!!



8th grade

had i known….omg. the revolting awakening of my same sex attraction. the crush on a best friend and nothing was ever the same again. it was 1985 and i was turning 13.

everything changed then. i became awkward around my male friends; whether i was attracted to them or not. it was awful.

then the lust began. lusting after my boys. imagining us doing unimaginable stuff.

it was 8th grade and it was 1985 and it was you…hubert hawkins. scottie page. vanilla & chocolate. oh man….i remember you two. there were rumors…you were the cutest guys in the whole school.

of course i was the outcast so all i could do was lust from afar. you prolly never even noticed me.


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